A powerful new wave of research and personal accounts is shining a spotlight on a persistent and striking divide: while European countries embrace children and families in nearly every sphere of life, American society remains hobbled by policies and attitudes that seem, at best, indifferent—and at worst, openly hostile—to children’s needs. The consequences reach far beyond inconvenience for parents, rippling through childhood development, public health, and even social cohesion.
This conversation about child-friendliness erupted once again following a viral first-person essay in Salon by a Philadelphia-based mother who described her travels through Berlin, London, and Dublin, highlighting the profound differences between Europe and the United States in daily life with children. Her observations draw attention to issues confirmed by social science research, expert commentary, and decades of comparative policy analysis.
Why does this matter for Thai readers? As Thailand continues to develop its own family policies and urban environments, lessons drawn from the contrasting approaches in the West offer critical insights. As Thai society confronts the dual challenges of urbanization and slowing fertility rates, the question of how to make public life, workplaces, and city design more child-and family-friendly is ever more urgent.
In the United States, parental exhaustion is compounded by societal structures and norms that make raising children both tiring and isolating. The Salon article provides vivid examples: arriving at Berlin Brandenburg Airport, the author is stunned that the taxi dispatcher offers a choice of a car seat or booster—an item nearly impossible to secure in the US without costly advance planning and physical exertion. A roomy and affordable hotel suite, family-friendly restaurant attitudes, and urban playgrounds integrated into the downtown landscape all contribute to a sense of belonging and shared community. In contrast, back home in Philadelphia, parents encounter “no kids” policies at restaurants, malls that ban teenagers after school, and wedding invitations that explicitly exclude children. The pervasive sentiment: children should be seen and not heard, or preferably, not seen at all (Salon, 2025).
The supporting research is unequivocal. Scholars like Janet Gornick and Marcia Meyers, in their pivotal book “Families That Work”, argue that the US is “long on talk and short on action” when it comes to work-family policies, compared to countries like Sweden, France, and Finland (Washington.edu, 2004). These European nations provide robust combinations of paid parental leave, universal early childhood education, generous vacation and sick leave, and wide availability of affordable childcare. American families, by comparison, face sky-high childcare costs, patchy job protections, and minimal public support for early parenting.
A more recent testimonial comes from an American mother who raised her first child in Oregon and her second in Madrid. In Spain, it’s “unheard of for pregnant women to work up until the last minute,” thanks to extended pre-and post-natal leave. Both parents are entitled to 16 weeks of fully paid, untaxed leave. Childcare costs are vastly lower than in the US, and children are fully integrated into daily adult life: children are expected and welcomed at restaurants, bars, and public events (Business Insider, 2025).
Structural and cultural differences underpin these policy choices. European nations tend to view caregiving and child-rearing as collective investments with broad social and economic payoffs, while the US remains anchored in individualism and “rugged self-reliance.” As a University of Washington professor explained, “Parents should be demanding more from government. The main reason they are not is probably that they are just too worn out by long hours of caring for children and earning a living.” In the US, working parents often resort to “tag team parenting”—juggling night shifts, precarious jobs, and unstable care arrangements in the absence of systemic support.
Children’s place in public life is another significant marker of divergence. Research by urban designers and child advocacy groups confirms that European cities intentionally cultivate environments where children’s presence is normalized and celebrated. From dedicated stroller spaces on buses to kindercafés filled with toys and games, Europe’s cities treat children as valued members of the urban community, not as disruptions. Play spaces are designed to encourage risk, creativity, and active engagement—unlike America’s highly regulated, “peak safety” playgrounds that are often boring and under-utilized, according to Philadelphia-based play researcher Meghan Talarowski (Child in the City, 2017).
Meanwhile, the “safetyism” of American society—in which parents risk arrest simply for letting their children walk alone—stifles children’s independence and shrinks the spaces where they can play, as detailed in a recent analysis in The Conversation (The Conversation, 2024). Suburban sprawl, lack of sidewalks, and car dependence make it nearly impossible for children to safely and spontaneously explore their neighbourhoods. This runs counter to the child-friendly urban design seen in Barcelona or Copenhagen, where pedestrian zones, playful infrastructure, and “soft” boundaries encourage children’s autonomy and community interaction.
The American author’s reflections in Salon underscore not just a difference of infrastructure or enforcement, but one of spirit and social values. “Our rejection of children in public is not without consequences for grown adults,” she writes, connecting childhood exclusion with the broader culture of individualism and a reluctance to embrace inclusivity. Like her, many parents long for a “village” approach to raising children—a network of public support, kindness from strangers, and urban spaces that make family life not only possible, but enjoyable.
What does this mean for Thailand? Thai families navigating Bangkok’s crowded streets or awaiting policy reform in maternity and paternity leave can draw important lessons from both sides of the Atlantic divide. Historically, Thailand’s own cultural traditions have leaned toward multigenerational support, with grandparents often providing childcare and family bonds reinforced by Buddhist values of compassion. Rapid urbanization and westernization, however, are beginning to erode these supports. Urban policy must therefore strike a balance between modernization and the preservation of communal care traditions.
Government officials in Thailand may wish to study the evidence from Europe: universal early education access lowers lifelong inequality, robust parental leave boosts child wellbeing and maternal employment, and child-friendly city planning enhances public safety and happiness across all age groups (Washington.edu, 2004; Business Insider, 2025). Introducing “family-first” policies is not only possible, but affordable over the long term; funding equal to roughly 1.5% of GDP could bridge the gap during children’s vulnerable early years.
Some Thai parents may already be experiencing echoes of “safetyism” as car-oriented city planning in Bangkok discourages children’s outdoor activity and independence. Advocacy from respected urban designers is urgently needed to ensure that city development prioritizes interconnected playgrounds, secure walking routes, and intergenerational public spaces—all factors proven to support child development and family wellbeing (The Conversation, 2024).
Should Thailand emulate the “European model,” or does it risk losing its unique family traditions? Experts point out that combining policy solutions from abroad with local cultural values can create a hybrid system tailored to Thai society’s evolving needs.
Looking to the future, several trends are clear. First, societies that invest in robust support networks for families and treat children as welcome public citizens—rather than private afterthoughts—produce stronger, happier, and healthier populations. Second, urbanization does not have to mean the decline of child-friendliness; with intentional policy and design, cities can become vibrant hubs of intergenerational connection. Lastly, for Thailand, the challenge is to turn social consensus around the value of family into actionable policies—whether in parental leave, childcare funding, or child-centric urban development.
For Thai policymakers, educators, and parents seeking to navigate these changes, the lesson is to prioritize both material policy support (like parental leave, affordable childcare, and public playgrounds) and cultural norms that genuinely welcome children into society. Parents should join with civil society to advocate for public designs and policies that make life with children easier, not harder. As Thailand balances modernity and tradition, embracing child-friendliness at every level offers a roadmap for a society where families thrive—not just survive.
Source citations: Salon essay, 2025; Washington.edu analysis, 2004; Business Insider Spain/US comparison, 2025; The Conversation urban design, 2024; Child in the City playground research, 2017.