A recently published European study has uncovered a deeply troubling trend in the world of late-life divorce: when wives in middle-aged marriages fall ill, the risk of divorce significantly increases, while the same does not hold true if it is the husband who becomes unwell. This discovery, revealed in February 2025 research appearing in the Journal of Marriage and Family and spotlighted in a widely-discussed article in Psychology Today, points to a persistent imbalance in marital roles and expectations that continue to shape the intimate lives of older adults across the globe—including in Thailand.
For decades, the classic marriage vow—“in sickness and in health”—has stood as a symbol of unwavering commitment. Yet, modern research signals that this vow may be far more fragile and conditional than previously believed, especially for middle-aged women managing illness within long-standing marriages. The study, conducted by a trio of psychological researchers—Daniele Vignoli, Giammarco Alderotti, and Cecilia Tomassini—tracked over 25,500 European heterosexual couples aged 50 to 64 from 2004 to 2022. It found that while overall divorce rates plateaued in recent years, they skyrocketed when wives developed serious health problems or physical limitations, but remained stable when husbands suffered comparable illnesses (Psychology Today).
This emerging “silver split” trend, a term used to describe divorces among people 50 and older, is not confined to the West. Although Thailand traditionally values long and stable marriages, demographic and social changes are driving up late-life separations, especially in urban areas. Rising life expectancies, shifting gender norms, and evolving attitudes toward divorce all shape the Thai context (Bangkok Post).
By the end of the 2010s in the US, the late-life divorce rate had doubled compared to 1989 figures, with around 10 out of every 1,000 adults over 50 ending their marriages annually—a trend matched or exceeded in parts of Europe such as France and Belgium (Purdue University). In Thailand, official statistics and the 2019 Thailand Health and Welfare Survey indicate a gradual rise in divorce across all ages, particularly in urban populations and among couples living apart for work reasons (National Statistical Office).
The European findings go deeper, offering a clear and gendered pattern: health-related instability in marriage leads disproportionately to divorce when it is the wife who is ill. This is not simply a story of physical incapacity or the burden of illness, but the result of entrenched gender expectations. For generations, Thai society—like much of the world—socialized girls to manage family care and household duties, while men were rarely prepared to fill these roles. As the study’s authors conclude, when a wife’s illness disrupts traditional domestic responsibilities, some husbands may see this as a crisis of the marriage’s “core contract,” rather than an opportunity for support and shared responsibility.
“Entrenched gender roles are at the heart of this pattern,” explains a Thai sociologist affiliated with Chulalongkorn University. “Women are expected to prioritize caregiving, often at the expense of their own well-being. If they get sick and can’t perform these duties, traditional mindsets may view this as a fundamental breach of marital expectations. Such attitudes can be much stronger among older generations, both in rural and urban Thailand.”
This pattern is evident worldwide. A 2023 study published in the Journal of Business and Psychology found that, even among contemporary couples, the labor of cooking, household management, and caregiving remains heavily skewed toward women (source). In the Thai context, family relationships anchored in “bun khun” (indebtedness and gratitude, especially toward mothers) can both cushion and intensify these gender expectations, especially in extended households.
But why does divorce rise so sharply when wives fall ill? Researchers speculate that the persistent expectation of the wife as the “linchpin” of the household means any disruption—such as chronic illness or disability—can be perceived as undermining the very foundation of married life. In contrast, when the husband is ill, the wife typically assumes the caregiving role, maintaining the status quo and buffering the marital bond.
The implications for health and welfare are profound. Late-life divorce has been linked to increased risk of depression, social isolation, and financial insecurity, especially for women. In Thailand, women in their 50s and 60s who divorce may face steep challenges obtaining adequate pension support, health coverage, and social acceptance, despite growing advocacy for gender equality (Stable Marital Histories Predict Happiness and Health Across Cultures). The loss of the extended family and rising migration for work further reduce the safety nets that once helped cushion marital disruption in later years.
At the same time, changing attitudes around marriage and divorce present new opportunities. Many Thai middle-aged and older women now seek autonomy, self-fulfillment, and social connection beyond traditional family structures. Support networks for divorced women, including social clubs and Facebook groups, are increasingly active in Bangkok, Chiang Mai, and even smaller cities. Key voices from the Thai Women’s Empowerment Funds point to the importance of breaking the silence around marital unhappiness and encouraging supportive community responses.
Nevertheless, the findings raise uncomfortable questions about how society values women’s unpaid labor and the resilience of the marriage institution during times of crisis. With Thailand facing an aging population and projected declines in marriage rates, experts advise that policy responses should focus on strengthening social support structures for elderly and divorced women, providing equal opportunities for lifelong health, and promoting more equitable domestic expectations from a young age (National Health Security Office).
From a historical perspective, Thai marriage has long rested on a blend of Buddhist and animist traditions, family involvement, and an ethic of endurance (“od ton”) in the face of hardship. Yet, even traditions adapt. Increasingly, Thai social commentators argue for a modern interpretation of the wedding vow, one that acknowledges the shared responsibility of both partners—and the urgent need for men to receive education and modeling in household care and emotional support.
Looking ahead, the study marks only the beginning of understanding shifting divorce dynamics amid health and gender changes. Researchers stress the need for further qualitative research, including in Asian societies, to probe the lived experiences behind the data. “We need to hear women’s voices—how they experience illness, support, and rejection within marriage,” urges a representative from the Thai Ministry of Social Development and Human Security. “Only then can we foster a culture of real partnership—both ‘in sickness and in health’.”
For Thai readers facing marital challenges or supporting loved ones through illness, experts recommend fostering open communication, seeking professional counseling, and exploring flexible models of shared family care. Community resources, including local health clinics and non-profit support groups, can offer education and respite for caregiving spouses. At a broader level, challenging entrenched gender norms—whether through school curricula, religious education, or workplace policies—remains vital for building more resilient families and healthier late-life relationships.
The latest research serves as a wake-up call: the institution of marriage, especially in later life, is only as strong as the mutual commitment it enshrines. As Thai society undergoes rapid transformation, ensuring that “in sickness and in health” becomes more than a rhetorical promise—and is lived, in practice, by both partners—is an urgent task for the years ahead.
Sources: Psychology Today, Purdue University, National Statistical Office of Thailand, PMC, [Journal of Marriage and Family], Bangkok Post, National Health Security Office, PMC Article