A new wave of psychological thinking is gaining traction worldwide thanks to motivational expert Mel Robbins’ simple “Let Them” theory, a mindset shift that is rapidly resonating with people burdened by stress, interpersonal conflict, and the struggle to set boundaries. According to Robbins and other supporters, the transformative power of these two words lies in their ability to free individuals from taking things personally, fostering inner calm and healthier relationships. As Thai society continues to grapple with rising mental health concerns, this theory offers a cross-cultural perspective with surprising resonance in Thailand’s Buddhist-influenced culture of acceptance and “letting go” (Upworthy; Mel Robbins Official).
The central tenet behind “Let Them” is surprisingly straightforward: when faced with criticism, rejection, or the seemingly questionable choices of others, simply let them. Instead of trying to control external situations, defend yourself, or internalise the negative actions of others, adopting this mindset can reduce anxiety and foster emotional resilience. Robbins argues that much of our distress springs not from events themselves, but from our reactions—often rooted in a compulsion to manage others’ opinions and behaviors. By practicing “Let Them,” people reclaim their emotional peace and learn the art of letting external matters remain external. This is especially urgent in today’s hyperconnected world, where social media magnifies the impacts of judgment, gossip, and online drama.
For Thai readers, the “Let Them” mindset will feel familiar. In Thai culture, the concept of “thum-jai” (ทำใจ)—loosely translated as “making peace with something” or accepting things as they are—has long been embedded in daily life. The Buddhist principle of non-attachment (anatta) teaches non-reactivity and flexibility in the face of impermanence, a value echoed in Robbins’ secular articulation of acceptance (PubMed). Thai idioms such as “jai yen” (ใจเย็น; cool-hearted) and “mai pen rai” (ไม่เป็นไร; never mind) further reinforce the wisdom of letting go of resentment, anger, and the need to always be right.
Mel Robbins’ “Let Them” theory gained widespread attention after she shared its essentials on her podcast and social media platforms. She explains, “When you ‘Let Them’ do whatever it is that they want to do, it creates more control and emotional peace for you and a better relationship with the people in your life.” Endorsed by therapists and life coaches, the approach is simple: rather than striving to manage how others see you or attempting to “fix” others when they behave hurtfully, you step back, relinquish control, and allow them to be who they are—without resistance or unnecessary self-involvement (Wondermind).
This method has psychological underpinnings backed by recent research. A number of studies indicate that acceptance-based mindsets—similar to those fostered by mindfulness and Buddhist non-attachment—are associated with lower anxiety, improved mood, and better relationship satisfaction. Recent trials on single-session mindset interventions found measurable reductions in negative emotions among adolescents and university students, with those adopting flexible, accepting beliefs demonstrating increased resilience (PubMed: SIGMA trial; PMC: Nonattachment). Endorsement from psychologists like John C. Maxwell, who teaches the “30-second rule” of positive engagement, ties the theory to broader research on encouraging communication and social connectedness.
But can a mindset as simple as “let them” truly impact mental health in a meaningful way? Psychologist and mindfulness-based therapy proponent interviewed by international media affirm its value for those struggling with burnout, high expectations, or social stress. “When you stop internalizing every slight and allow others to be responsible for their own actions, you become more grounded. It’s an antidote to the anxiety caused by our need to please others or control what cannot be controlled,” one therapist told The Everygirl.
The cultural application in a Thai context is particularly intriguing. Thai society’s embrace of mindfulness and acceptance as tools for wellbeing is evident in the proliferation of mindfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT) retreats and the integration of Buddhist philosophies within mainstream healthcare (WellnessTourism.com). The notion of thum-jai, or emotional acceptance, was highlighted in a 2019 qualitative study as a vital coping strategy, helping Thais approach difficulties without excessive attachment to outcomes or self-blame (APA PsycNet). This non-attachment is not synonymous with apathy, but demonstrates a flexible, non-reactive stance toward unwanted change—precisely what Robbins advocates.
Globally, the “Let Them” movement is generating viral enthusiasm among those exhausted by people-pleasing or defensive communication. Social media is awash with anecdotes of individuals who have implemented the theory in their work, family, and romantic relationships, resulting in less stress and more authentic connection. Detractors, however, caution that the philosophy must be applied judiciously—granting permission for disrespectful or abusive behavior is not advised, and there is a fine distinction between letting go of control and abdicating healthy boundaries.
For Thailand, where societal harmony is prized but emotional suppression can sometimes lead to unresolved mental health struggles, the call to “let them” offers both practical and cultural relevance. The increase in mental health awareness—marked by conferences promoting mindfulness, campaigns encouraging open dialogue, and the growth of mental health services—positions the theory as another tool for the Thai mental wellbeing toolkit (Nation Thailand; MBCT Thailand PDF).
Educators and mental health professionals could incorporate “Let Them” as a cognitive exercise during stress management workshops, as it resonates with Buddhist-informed practices already widely used in Thai psychiatric care. For example, hospitals and wellness centers regularly employ mindfulness-based interventions to reduce pain, anxiety, and depressive symptoms. Adding a focus on non-attachment to negative social judgments or difficult interpersonal events could enhance resilience, especially among adolescents and office workers facing performance pressure.
Importantly, solutions shouldn’t stop at slogans. “Let Them” is most effective as part of comprehensive emotional self-care, including mindfulness, self-reflection, and assertiveness training. In a Thai family or office setting, open discussion of emotions—balanced with the cultural preference for indirect communication—can make space for both setting boundaries and practicing acceptance.
Looking forward, ongoing research is needed to understand how Western motivational theories align with or diverge from Thai cultural values and Buddhist psychology. If “Let Them” gains popularity among Thai influencers and educators, as mindfulness and meditation have, it may inspire a new generation to seek inner peace not by controlling others, but by managing their own emotional reactions.
The message for Thai readers is clear: in moments of social anxiety, conflict, or disappointment, try embracing the “Let Them” mindset. Practice thum-jai and allow others to behave as they will, while focusing on your own peace and personal boundaries. Paired with local customs of graciousness and restraint, this modern mantra is a potent reminder that sometimes, the path to happiness lies in letting go.
For those interested in further practical steps, consider blending daily mindfulness practice with moment-to-moment reminders to “let them.” Write it on a post-it note at your desk, repeat it silently when tension arises, or incorporate it into your meditation or prayer. Over time, these small shifts may contribute to lower stress and deeper contentment—rooted both in contemporary psychology and centuries-old Thai wisdom.
For more on the theory, see Mel Robbins’ official website (melrobbins.com), recent research on acceptance mindsets (PMC Nonattachment), or the “Let Them” resources on Amazon.