A child’s confidence can hinge on a single sentence. A husband’s offhand remark that his daughter is “not talented” can wound more than a moment of pride for the family photo. That uncomfortable scene, echoed in a popular advice piece about a parent who openly belittles his daughter, sits at the center of a growing conversation about how parents talk about talent, failure, and growth. New research in child development suggests a simple but powerful idea: praising effort, strategies, and learning processes—rather than labeling a child as inherently talented—can help girls and boys develop resilience, curiosity, and higher achievement over time. For Thai families navigating pillars of respect, harmony, and family pride, these findings offer a practical path to strengthen children’s motivation without compromising cultural values.
In many Thai households, parental guidance is delivered within a framework of care, expectation, and the want to protect children from disappointment. Yet the way adults talk about ability—whether they frame success as a fixed gift or a skill that can be built—has a measurable impact on how children approach challenges. The growing body of research on growth mindset—a belief that abilities can improve with effort, instruction, and time—points toward a truth that resonates across cultures: feedback that emphasizes effort and strategy tends to encourage persistence, problem-solving, and long-term learning. By contrast, praise that centers on “talent” or innate smartness can unintentionally send a message that effort is unnecessary or even futile when success doesn’t come easily. In the Thai context, where family cohesion and respect for elders guide everyday interactions, the way praise is framed inside the home can either nurture courage to try new things or foster fear of failure and avoidance.
The latest studies in education and psychology paint a nuanced picture. Growth mindset interventions often yield beneficial effects on students’ willingness to tackle difficult tasks, especially when paired with concrete strategies and supportive guidance. Children who hear that effort matters and that mistakes are a natural part of learning are more likely to persist after setbacks, seek feedback, and adopt effective study approaches. But researchers caution that the effects are not universal or dramatic in every setting. The size of benefits tends to be modest and highly contingent on context: the quality of instruction, the availability of help and resources, the school climate, and the family environment all shape how a growth mindset translates into real-world outcomes. Simply telling a child to “try harder” without giving them tools, structure, and encouragement can limit potential, or even backfire if the child experiences repeated failure with no supportive scaffolding.
For Thai families, the implications are clear and practical. If a parent routinely labels a daughter as “talented” and then treats any struggle as a sign of failure, the child may internalize a fear of not meeting the label. She might pursue only activities she perceives as safe or highly eligible to win praise, or she may avoid challenging subjects where growth is slow. In contrast, a focus on effort, strategy, and visible progress—paired with appropriate praise for specific steps taken, such as “you broke the problem into smaller parts” or “you practiced those questions for twenty minutes”—helps a child believe that improvement is possible with deliberate practice. This distinction matters not only for math or science but for arts, sports, languages, and future career choices that Thailand’s students will increasingly face in a fast-evolving economy.
The gender dimension adds another layer. In Thailand and many parts of Southeast Asia, girls still encounter stereotypes about which subjects and career paths are suitable for them. Parental messages that emphasize natural talent can reinforce the idea that girls must “show they’re special” to succeed, potentially narrowing their willingness to engage in challenging domains where mastery comes after hard work. Conversely, when parents affirm effort, curiosity, and problem-solving, girls—and boys—are more likely to persist in difficult tasks, seek feedback, and view setbacks as part of growth rather than as confirmations of limitation. In schools across Thailand, where curriculum reforms stress critical thinking and collaborative learning, integrating growth-mindset language with practical teaching strategies can reinforce what teachers are trying to cultivate in classrooms and what families can reinforce at home.
There’s also a cultural balance to strike. Thai families often value harmony, respect for elders, and the dignity of not causing worry for others. A blunt critique framed as “you’re not talented” can damage trust and provoke shame, which in turn can deter students from asking for help or attempting something outside their comfort zone. Framing feedback with warmth, specificity, and actionable steps respects cultural norms while aligning with evidence that supportive, growth-focused conversations help children perform better under pressure. Buddhist concepts of mindful effort and compassionate self-improvement align well with the growth-mindset approach, suggesting that a parents’ intention to guide, rather than label, can be expressed in language that honors dignity while encouraging persistence.
What does this mean for Thai families and the people who shape children’s minds every day—parents, grandparents, teachers, and mentors? It means moving from a simple dichotomy of talent versus effort to a more nuanced practice: acknowledge effort and strategy, celebrate incremental progress, and provide concrete steps to overcome obstacles. It also means pairing praise with guidance. Instead of saying, “You’re so gifted at this,” a parent can say, “I’m impressed by how you approached this problem, and I’d like to help you build a routine to practice more.” Instead of labeling a child as naturally smart, parents can emphasize learning strategies, study plans, and the value of trying again after mistakes. In the Thai home, this approach can be woven into everyday routines—study times at the kitchen table, shared problem-solving moments after dinner, or collaborative project planning with siblings.
From a policy and school perspective, Thai education leaders and communities have a chance to translate growth-minded principles into scalable actions. Teacher professional development can include training on feedback language that emphasizes process and strategies, not just outcomes. Parent education programs, delivered through community centers, temples, and school-parent associations, can model conversations that frame setbacks as data for improvement rather than verdicts on worth. Digital tools—apps that encourage daily reflection on what was learned, what strategy was used, and what to try next—could help families practice growth-minded language in familiar contexts. In Bangkok’s bustling neighborhoods, and across provincial towns where families juggle work, resources, and child care, such practical supports can make the concept actionable rather than theoretical.
For Thailand to realize the benefits of this research, it needs to address both strengths and gaps. The country has a strong tradition of parental involvement in education, and Thai families often place a high priority on academic achievement. That foundation can be harnessed to promote growth-minded feedback that is culturally sensitive and practically useful. Schools can model growth mindset in their feedback loops, inviting students to articulate their own strategies for improvement and to set concrete goals. Parents can be invited into the process with simple, evidence-informed guidance: notice effort, acknowledge learning strategies, and provide targeted support for practice, not just praise for results. In doing so, Thai children—particularly girls who may face unique social expectations—can build confidence that extends beyond the classroom and into their communities, careers, and daily lives.
Looking ahead, researchers emphasize several caveats and opportunities. Growth mindset is not a magic fix; it is one piece of a larger puzzle that includes high-quality instruction, access to resources, and an environment that welcomes persistent effort. The best outcomes arise when growth-oriented language is paired with structured opportunities to practice, feedback that is specific and actionable, and a supportive social climate that treats mistakes as stepping stones. In Thai society, where family harmony and respect hold deep value, the challenge is to deliver this messaging in a way that preserves dignity, fosters resilience, and encourages girls to pursue ambitious paths in science, technology, engineering, and beyond. Policy makers, educators, and parents can work together to create ecosystems where children learn to treat challenges as opportunities to grow, rather than as threats to value or status.
The practical takeaway for Thai households is clear. Start by reframing conversations around abilities. Replace fixed labels with growth-minded language. Highlight the concrete steps a child can take to improve, and offer hands-on support to develop those steps. Encourage children to set process-oriented goals—such as completing a practice set, seeking feedback, or trying a new strategy—and celebrate progress toward those goals, not only perfect outcomes. Create a home environment that normalizes making mistakes and trying again, and do so with warmth, patience, and practical guidance. For families where a parent’s remarks have not always supported growth, it’s never too late to begin anew: a single conversation about the value of effort, paired with a plan and a little daily practice, can set a child on a longer, healthier trajectory toward learning, confidence, and success.
In the end, the Thai child’s journey toward high achievement is inseparable from the everyday conversations that shape how she sees herself and her potential. The choice of words—growth-oriented and process-focused rather than talent-focused—may seem small, but it carries a substantial influence over a child’s willingness to take risks, to persist, and to dream big. When parents choose to champion effort and strategy, they offer a gift that aligns with both contemporary scientific understanding and timeless Thai values: the belief that with guidance, practice, and perseverance, every child can grow into the best version of themselves.